


Correspondence [Katsura Kotarou RE: Sakamoto Tatsuma; Letter #1]

by mangemouth



Category: Gintama
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-02
Updated: 2013-07-02
Packaged: 2017-12-16 21:03:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/866581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mangemouth/pseuds/mangemouth
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>A dumb drabble in nine seconds for <a href="http://asuka-chan.livejournal.com/profile"><img class="i-ljuser-userhead"/></a><a class="i-ljuser-username" href="http://asuka-chan.livejournal.com/"></a><b>asuka_chan</b>, who knows the real truth about what's inside Elizabeth. Set during the present.</p>
    </blockquote>





	Correspondence [Katsura Kotarou RE: Sakamoto Tatsuma; Letter #1]

**Author's Note:**

> A dumb drabble in nine seconds for [](http://asuka-chan.livejournal.com/profile)[](http://asuka-chan.livejournal.com/)**asuka_chan** , who knows the real truth about what's inside Elizabeth. Set during the present.

Dear Sakamoto,

I am well, thank you for asking. At least, this is what I assume you were asking; for future reference, you should wait to finish your missive before eating your lunch [I trust the spicy seafood curry was good].

The rebellion has recently hit a snag, or "eensy snafu." During a reconnaissance mission at the Shisengumi HQ, a nameless Joui member [read: not male anatomy] was distracted by the vending machine. But said nameless Joui member [read: still not male anatomy] is not at fault at all, is he? It is completely disgusting that those mindless drones of the poisonous ruling classes have a snack and beverage machine, where the Joui only have their wives' bento boxes for sustenance! And what of the members [read: allies] who are not wed to a woman, but to Japan? Is their hunger not important? There is no justice in this world for those who do the right thing! _There are no packets of cookies or cans of lemonade, either!_

In any case, the plan went to pot, but when that sadist tried to shoot me he blew up their vending machine. Bonzai!

Additionally, please try harder not to anger Mutsu-san any more than you usually do [perhaps this advice comes too late, judging by the blood on the envelope]. If you will recall, Mutsu-san’s temper is often directly proportionate to how inebriated you are. Remember, you are an important tradesman now [I am very proud of your success] and you would do well to tone down your sake intake for the sake of your company's smooth running. Also, I believe Mutsu-san is entirely capable of smothering you to death in your sleep [read: with _pillows_ ].

I look forward to your visit at the end of the month [provided you are not an idiot who exposes himself to half of Edo, as you did last time]. As always, I wish you luck on your quest to find the ever-elusive Planet of Pretty Girls Who Want to Marry You.

All the best,  
Katsura

PS: Elizabeth says 'hello' and would like to add that she 'hopes you bring a Pretty Girl back from space for her.' She really is lacking in female companionship now that I think about it, perhaps I should sign her up for a baking class? I do not know.


End file.
